May 7, 2016

I'm writing from a remote undisclosed location this week, but thanks to the magic of the internet, you can't even tell! We don't seem to be convenient to anything here so we don't plan on partaking of nightlife. Don't let that stop you! There are loads of creatively named bands out there, including these five:

Fire Retarded
This is a rare appropriate use of the word "retarded." Safety first!

Hollow Sidewalks
There's a whole underground city down there! (In Seattle, this is literally true.)


Lunch
The other most important meal of the day. I want to see them on a bill with Pouch and Porch.

Pastel Motel
This one has a fun rhyme, and an odd nostalgic appeal for me. When I was around 9 years old, I read a funny middle-grade novel called The Pink Motel by Carol Ryrie Brink, about resourceful children playing detective around a rundown motel in Florida. It stuck with me even though I read it only once and didn't encounter it again for over 20 years, when I found a copy at a church rummage sale. I bought it and still have it, another 20+ years down the road. I still haven't stayed in a pastel motel myself, but I hope to someday.


Valley Maker 
Hint: it's water, in liquid or solid form.

October 24, 2015

Next Saturday is Halloween, which means the coming week's club listings are stuffed like a trick-or-treat bag with spooky-themed shows. Today, I'm purposely avoiding any band names with ghost, witch, or blood in them, but I might change my mind next Saturday. I selected the following treats, instead:

Caddywhompus
I love colloquialisms, and this is one of my favorites. So much more fun to say than "not quite right," its syllables and thumping consonants have a nice beat.


Mrch
They say it's pronounced "march," so that's a fairly economical spelling. My first thought was "merch," which is funny because that's already short for something. Either is suitable for a gig: it's a beat, or it's T-shirts and records.


PORCH
I'm a fan both of singular monosyllabic nouns as band names, and also of porches. Porch season is over for another year, but it's a great place to make music on a warm summer night. Also, somebody get these guys on a bill with Square Pig faves Pouch!

Tygerrs Lair
Wyldernesse 
How is it these two are not on the same bill? Not only do they both use beautiful Middle-Englishy spelling, but where would that lair be but in the wyldernesse? (This might be why: Tygerrs Lair is metal, while Wyldernesse is acoustic folk. Still . . .)

March 7, 2015

 Square Pig faves Acapulco Lips, Pouch, and Power Skeleton are all playing tonight (not together, but wouldn't that be a killer lineup?) but I'm missing it all for the opera. All I can say is, Handel better be worth it. Meanwhile, here's five new favorites:

Field Mouse
I am reminded of my mom. House mice freaked her out, but she thought the outdoor variety (she called them meadow mice) were cute. There was even a poster of one on the fridge. But if a cat brought one indoors, forget it.

Flyleaf
Literary in a literal and very particular way.

Little Fixtures
Maybe it's my diminutive size, but I'm drawn to names with "little" in them. I like how in this case, it's paired with something solid and permanent. There's also the added attraction of a neat little off-rhyme.

The Shaken Growlers
I can easily believe this name grew out of an unfortunate incident bringing beer home from the bottle shop. Promises an exuberant, messy time.

Toyboat Toyboat Toyboat
I have to respect a band that chose a name most people can't say fast, even sober. (These guys actually are on the same bill with Power Skeleton tonight.)

My fiction and blogging projects collide in "St. Rage,"  the 13th release in the Pankhearst Singles Club. This story of an all-girl teenage garage band with superpowers is short, it's funny, and it's only $ .99. If you like "St. Rage," please like St. Rage on Facebook and go listen to their first demo, "Huge Guy in the Mosh Pit."

I play drums in a band called Your Mother Should Know. Our album Rocks and Glass is available now on Bandcamp.

November 23, 2014

Due to a shortened holiday week, the pickings are a little slim in the club listings, so I'm taking this opportunity to do a Thanksgiving Retrospective of some favorites from the past. I have selected from Square Pig's first year in two categories: Names that are still Hands-Down Brilliant and Bands that have Been on a Bill with Your Mother Should Know. Here's what I had to say way back when:

Hands-Down Brilliant


Eighteen Individual Eyes
(from November 13, 2010) I have delighted in this name for months, so I'm thrilled they came up this week. The inclusion of "individual" makes it for me -- it's not just "eighteen eyes" but "eighteen individual eyes."  Is this an eighteen-eyed creature, each eye functioning independently? Eighteen one-eyed creatures? A nine-piece band? It's also fun to say -- all those vowels just roll off the tongue.

Out Like Pluto
(from November 20, 2010) I like Pluto. I'm sorry it got demoted from the planet club. On the other hand, it's so far out, maybe it doesn't want to be in our lame club.

High Class Wreckage
(from January 8, 2011) Yay! I've been waiting for these guys to show up. This name trips off the tongue, yet feels like an oxymoron. Full disclosure: I've seen High Class Wreckage twice. Their shows are reliably loud, dumb, full-on fun. Expect high-jinks and physical contact. (Technically, HCW was on a bill with YMSK, but before my tenure so I'm not counting it).

Garage a Trois
(from April 16, 2011) The perfect relationship in the garage-band capital. Way to pull off a foreign-language pun! (I'm also amused that the band is a four-piece).

Gazebo of Destruction
(from May 14, 2011) This one belongs to the opposing images school of band names. "Gazebo" is refined, elegant, civilized. "Destruction" is everything but. It doesn't hurt that "gazebo" figures in a couple of running family jokes.



 On a Bill with Your Mother Should Know

Ancient Warlocks
(from February 5, 2011) This appeals to my fantasy-novel side. Music and fiction are the closest to magic we can get: something out of nothing. It also evokes Spinal Tap and their tiny Stonehenge, and that makes me smile.

Black Plastic Clouds
(from November 5, 2011) As if black clouds weren't threatening enough! Any mention of black plastic reminds me of the ultimately ineffective weed barrier the previous owner of our house used in the front yard. We were digging pieces of black plastic out of the ground for years.


Curtains for You
(from December 4, 2010) Full disclosure: I'd heard of this band years before I saw them at the Columbia City Theatre (which has a stage with actual curtains), and the keyboard player has visited my house. But I think I would list them even if that weren't so. I like how the name references another era and aspect of American pop culture. (I tend to pronounce it "coitains" like the gangsters in old Bugs Bunny cartoons.) 


Pouch
(July 2, 2011) I've been hearing about these guys and liked the name from the start. Pouch is one of those words that's fun and funny to say. (I'm planning to go hear them at EMP today, so it seemed like a good time to drop them into the blog.) I hope to see more bands named for hand luggage.

April 19, 2014

We've been fasting from alcohol for Lent, and I don't really drink pop anymore, so when we went out to the Victory Lounge on Good Friday, I ended up standing around with a water glass in my hand most of the night. It was an intoxicating evening, anyway, thanks to Kleine, Hoax Foot, Lion Pincher, and Pouch!

This week's picks:

Gloomsday
AKA three-fourths of March - June in Seattle. Turn up the music. (I also appreciate the Joyce reference.)

Lion Pincher
It takes a lot of nerve (or stupidity) to pinch a lion. As I understand it, one member of this duo is a Leo and the other is a Cancer. Given the opportunity, a crab probably would pinch a lion -- that's what crabs do. Lion Pincher is also the band at the intersection of past honorees Hoax Foot and Pouch. These three bands would make for a very compact show to take on the road.

Moon Hooch
The repeated oo sound is fun. Is this another name for moonshine, or is this another level of illegal:  bootleg moonshine?

Parzival
Couldn't be more perfect for a show on Good Friday.

A Yawn Worth Yelling
The repeated y sound is not only fun to say, but conducive to yawning. This is secretly an effective vocal exercise.

February 15, 2014

It's that weird time of year when we've just had snow but it's starting to look and feel like spring; when Seattle high schoolers, two weeks into a new semester, take a week off to recover; when the year no longer feels new but I still have to think before writing the date. On the upside, a Monday holiday offers the rare opportunity to go out on a Sunday night! Make the most of it.

BowieVision
This technological marvel brought to you by Ziggy Stardust. Always in style.

(he thinks he's people)
Why do I assume this is aimed at the drummer? (I also like the parentheses. There's generally not enough punctuation in band names.)

Hoax Foot
I read this as a translation of pseudopod, a favorite term from high school biology. (In what I understand is their first outing, this duo is playing on the aforementioned Sunday night on a bill with former Square Pig honorees Pouch and Canals of Venice. Enjoyed a solo set by one of the members last summer, so I'm looking forward to it!)

Propagandhi
Excellent name pun! Politically slanted promotion of non-violent resistance -- what's not to like?

Slutever
So appropriate that they played on Valentine's Day!

July 6, 2013

Tonight! Your Mother Should Know is pleased and honored to be included with Old Man Williamson, Pouch and Peterman on the bill for Peterman's record release at Victory Lounge, 9:00 p.m. Free! I even get to step out from behind the drums and sing one number, so it's a momentous occasion.

And we're not the only well named bands out there this week. Try these on:

Golden Robot Army
I'm thinking old-school giant robots here, with laser eyes, and golden armor gleaming in the sun as they take their rightful place as our overlords.

Kingdom Crumbs
. . . thy will be dumb . . .

Loud Eyes
That's some serious synesthesia! Not just mis-wired senses, but the sensory organs themselves, doing things they can't.

Special Explosion District
Anywhere on July 4?

The Woolen Men
I picture a set of cuddly knitted golems. I wish they were on the same bill with the Golden Robot Army.

June 29, 2013

How can this be? It's hot, and still June! Does this bode well or ill for July 4? Which reminds me: time for a shameless plug! Your Mother Should Know is pleased and honored to be included with Pouch and Peterman on the bill for Peterman's record release at Victory Lounge next Saturday, July 6, 8:30 p.m. And on Friday, July 5, 8:00 p.m. the members of Your Mother Should Know (Neal Kosaly Meyer and yours truly) will present "Songs Your Mother Should Know," a three-song cycle of Neal's recent neo-Tin-Pan-Alley songs at Seattle Composers Salon, Chapel Performance Space,

4649 Sunnyside Ave N, 4th Fl, Seattle. $5 - $15 sliding scale admission.

There's lots going on before that, and here is a well-named sampling:

The Botherations

"Botheration" was one of my mom's favorite (clean) exclamations. I love the association of an old-fashioned expression with today's music.

Dragontail Peak

This one hits my fantasy reader and writer spot. While you're worrying about the dragon's mouth, the tail will come around and take you out from behind.

Fuzzy Cloaks

It's way too warm to want a fuzzy cloak, but it's such a comforting image. Or is it . . . distortion?

Mega EvErs

An audacious and clever punning nod to history and activism.

Swamp Meat 

I couldn't believe I hadn't done this name already. It has the obvious sludgy, undead association, but then you say it out loud and it sounds like something completely different. They keep being on bills with friends of YMSK, so I'm bound to hear them before long.

August 25, 2012

Perennial Square Pig favorite Pouch is at the Funhouse tonight! Might just go. Meanwhile, here are the new picks:

Jar of Flies
Yuck. Either somebody caught them and put them in there, or they hatched in there, like the fruit flies we bred for biology class when I was in high school. I can still smell the stink.

No-See-Ums
More insects! I've always liked this name for the tiniest of camping pests. Does a funny name make them more or less irritating?

Primate 5
At last, a mammal, and an open admission that we are primates, too. "Band" being one of the accepted terms for a group of apes, including humans.

Safeword  Sasquatch
And, another primate! What I like here is that "safeword" implies kink, and interest in Sasquatch is about as nerdy as you can get.

She Keeps Bees
Back to insects. I like all the long e sounds, and the monosyllables, and the complete sentence, with the hint of urban agriculture: "I've got chickens, he's got a goat, and she keeps bees."

June 16, 2012

Many thanks to Pouch, Antique Scream, White Orange, and Ancient Warlocks for a loud, heavy time at the Funhouse last weekend! Not a dud in the bunch, which is what you want when you don't get out often. And happy Father's Day to all the cool rockin' daddies out there!

Abducted by Sharks
In this reality, aliens bite your leg off.

Boaconstructor
A case of changing one letter to change the whole meaning: a snake who builds things, or perhaps the person who fastens all the feathers together into a stole. I like that it's one word, too.

Ennui Trust
Fun two ways! On paper, a safe place to store your boredom. Spoken, the motto on our money, with a key word missing.

Roaming Herds of Buffalo
How big is the stage, anyway?! An expansive band name that evokes the wide open spaces of the West.

Wookie Party
Vote Wookie! (Do their candidates pull people's arms out of their sockets when they lose?)

June 2, 2012

I regret that I never blogged about God's Favorite Beefcake in happier times. I noticed the name more than once, but for some reason it never made the list. I love the humorous grandiosity packed into three words. Let's all make music and try to love one another. RIP, Drew and Joe.

Cat Food
Maybe it's because I just fed my cats, but I want to know: kibble, canned, or rodent? Or something to feed the soul of a real cool cat?

Conspiracy of Beards
This is arresting and funny on its own, even without the description: "An a capella choir singing arrangements of Leonard Cohen songs." Wow.

I Wish We Were Robots
I'm ever fond of names that are complete sentences. This one has that sci-fi aspect that's always a plus with me. And it's the kind of sentence where I want to know the rest of the story: who's "we" and why robots?

Sons of Huns
It rhymes! Monosyllables! And they're on the same bill with Pouch -- I might even make it to this show.

Twisted Trystan
A tongue-twister that includes the word Twisted? Nice.

November 12, 2011

Things have taken a definitive turn; the weather feels like typical November in Seattle. It kept us from going out to hear Pouch last night, but tonight we hope to find the will to get out for The True Bugs.

Are You a Cat?
You don't often see a band name that's a question. And what a question! If the answer is "yes" you can't expect an answer, or much more than a disdainful glance, rendering the question unnecessary.

Bobby Joe Ebola and the Children Macnuggits
Overlong and comically disturbing. I laugh and say "ew" in the same breath.


The True Bugs
I remember learning about true bugs in 9th grade biology. It was both gratifying and amusing to learn that "bug" was a technical term.

Twangshifters
I've been thinking about vowel shifts recently. This is the first time I've considered a twang shift, but hey -- why not? Spoken language evolves, and I'm glad we don't yet all sound alike.

We Were Promised Jetpacks
I have an enduring soft spot for the past's vision of the future. We have near-instanteous global communication that some use to complain that we don't have jetpacks and flying cars. Meanwhile, I have at least 10 household lasers and I'm typing on a tiny yet powerful computer connected wirelessly to every other computer in the house and to the Internet. I admit it -- it's the future.

July 16, 2011

I'm on vacation! Among other things, that means I get to see at least one show next week, on a "school night," and it should be a ripsnorter! I've already blogged about two of the bands on the bill, and the third appears in this week's list.

Big Crinkly Trio
I like the word "crinkly." Considering this outfit is appearing at Gallery 1412, the word could very well describe at least some of the sounds they make. It sounds like a friendly way into improv.


Doseywallips
Local flavor -- one of our great NW place names.


Moraine
Gritty residue that remains when the glacier recedes. These rocks haven't just rolled; they have been ground.

South Sound Bureau Chiefs
This one has a particularly wonky vibe that makes me smile. Serious journalism invades the dive bar scene . . .

Your Mother Should Know
It's too early for a Web presence, but this band opens for Pouch and High Class Wreckage -- it should be a great, loud, fun show. I wasn't blogging yet the last time YMSK played out, or this name would have appeared a long time ago. Now is better, though. Full disclosure: I share a full set of parents with the bandleader, and the next time YMSK gets a gig, that'll be me, the Square Pig herself, behind the drums. (This show came up too fast for the latest incarnation of the full band to learn the set). I feel I can legitimately blog about it because I thought it was a great name the first time I heard it, before there even was a band. As the instigator was inviting people to join, a potential recruit listed "Your Mother Should Know" as her favorite Beatles song. She ultimately did not join up, but the name stuck, even through multiple personnel changes and near collapse. It works as a band name because it's a song about a song, about getting up and dancing, about the longevity of good music. It's a piece of advice: "Listen to your mother -- she should know." One of us actually is a mother, and we all have offspring in the age-range of our probable audience. And two out of three bandmembers share a mother; it was on her guitar that the leader learned to play, back in 1983, the last time we had a family band. Just goes to show, it's never too late to get up and dance.

July 2, 2011

A new month, a beautiful day, a holiday weekend -- what's not to like? Get out and hear some music!

Electrik Emily
Klondike Kate
These two follow the same naming formula and are on the same bill, so I'll talk about them together. You can hardly go wrong with adjective-person's name, especially if both begin with the same letter and/or sound. It doesn't hurt that Klondike Kate sounds like a gold-rush character (local flavor). That double-k sound in Electrik makes these two go together even better.

Pouch
I've been hearing about these guys and liked the name from the start. Pouch is one of those words that's fun and funny to say. (I'm planning to go hear them at EMP today, so it seemed like a good time to drop them into the blog.) I hope to see more bands named for hand luggage.


Slothpop
I don't always name favorites, but this is my favorite name of the week. It jumped out of the listings and made me laugh out loud. It sounds like a great genre for summer -- kind of slow and lazy. Or else a quiescently frozen confection with the strangest flavor . . .

Titanium Sporkestra
Spork is always funny, a titanium spork would be absurd, and the wordplay takes it over the top and onto the blog. I understand this is a marching band, which makes it even better.