December 27, 2014

I'm pleased to announce that on New Year's Day, my blogging and fiction-writing lives will intersect in an exciting way. My first published story ("Hat" in the YA collection Heathers) ended with the teenage protagonist going off to start a band. Several months later, I saw a sign with a burned-out letter. "That's a band name I would blog about," I thought. I decided to give it to my fictional teenager, and she ran with it. The resulting story, "St. Rage," is now available for pre-order and will be published on January 1, 2015 as the 13th release in the Pankhearst Singles Club. It's short, it's funny, and it's only $ .99. If you like "St. Rage," please like St. Rage on Facebook and go listen to their first demo.

Meanwhile, a lot of nonfictional bands have shows coming up this week. Here are the five that caught my eye:



Cat Among Pigeons
Classic outsider scenario with so many possible outcomes. Cat bides her time, blending in and winning the pigeons' trust, then begins to pick them off one by one; they never figure it out. Or: Cat goes crazy trying to chase all the pigeons at once, and never catches even one. Or: the pigeons lull the cat into a false sense of security, then descend en masse.

Cephalopod
I like the word and I like the animals. An octopus is like a writer: clever, solitary, makes its escape in a cloud of ink. Most appropriately, they're playing at the SeaMonster Lounge.


It Gets Worse
A simple and obvious play on the It Gets Better campaign, but so punk and so often true.


The Knowmads
Fun with our crazy English spelling. Wandering in a cognitive wilderness.


ZZ Top's Drummer's Drum Machine's Manager's Band
It gives me great pleasure to close out 2014 with something so gleefully over the top and simultaneously so depressingly downwardly spiraling.  

UPCOMING: Your Mother Should Know album release show, with Tom Price Desert Classic, Can You Imagine?, and Dead Bars  Friday, January 23 at the Highline Bar. I'd want to go to this show even if I wasn't playing! https://www.facebook.com/events/374070109426331/

December 20, 2014

Here in Seattle, we're dreaming of a wet Christmas, as usual. There are plenty of interesting shows scheduled this week -- even a few on Christmas Eve -- so if, unlike me, you are not responsible for Christmas preparations, get out there and make some band's holiday brighter. I'm bestowing my blog gift on these five:

Atomic Ballroom
I like how the first four syllables make you think it's headed one apocalyptic way, and then it makes a sharp turn into something completely different and joyous. And can't you just see the Jetsonsesque neon sign for this joint?

pigWar
A favorite incident of local history in one word. The non-standard capitalization makes it a treat for the eye as well as the ear.

Puddle of Mudd
I've always liked how mud and puddle not only go together but sound alike. That double-d completes the affinity.

Spirit Award
It sounds good, but everyone knows it's code for the Talentless Try-hard Trophy. But in this land of loser pride, that's a badge of honor.

Worm Ourobouros
The joke with worms is that you can't tell the front from the back. If it's swallowing itself, presumably the worm can tell.

UPCOMING: Your Mother Should Know album release show, with Tom Price Desert Classic, Can You Imagine?, and Dead Bars  Friday, January 23 at the Highline Bar. I'd want to go to this show even if I wasn't playing! https://www.facebook.com/events/374070109426331/

December 13, 2014

In addition to blogging about band names, I write a lot of long and short fiction. I don't trust poetry and only write it when I have to, so it's a little weird to announce that I am now a published poet.  My little effort "Popcorn" appears in the first Pankhearst Slim Volume, No Love Lost, now available in paperback here: getbook.at/nll

With that shameless plug out of the way, let's get down to the business at hand:

Connie and the Precious Moments

The surviving mug.

I'm a perennial fan of the classic X and the Y structure, especially when there's some clever twist to one or both parts. Nothing could be further from rock and roll than sentimental figurines. I have my own fraught relationship with Precious Moments, having received a set of four PM mugs as a wedding gift. We were not particularly sorry when some of them broke, but after 28 years, one remains and may outlive us all.



Good Luck Thrift Store Outfit
I like how this starts out as a random collection of not-obviously-related words, and then comes together in the end, much like an outfit assembled at Value Village. I have a few of these.

My Body Sings Electric
The old lit major in me is tickled by the connection of rock music to Whitman.

Sepiatonic
This makes a neat turn from old-timey Americana to a slick modern -- dare I say (1960s) futuristic -- vibe. 

South Kitsap Infidels  
Local flavor! There's a nice disconnect in the very specific locale modifying a noun seemingly from a whole other world.  

UPCOMING: Your Mother Should Know CD release show, with Tom Price Desert Classic, Can You Imagine?, and Dead Bars  Friday, January 23 at the Highline Bar. I'd want to go to this show even if I wasn't playing! https://www.facebook.com/events/374070109426331/

December 6, 2014

A new record: last week's post got 100 views! For a blog that usually gets 30 or 40, this is like the big time. Thanks to everyone who shares it with their friends! And thanks also to all the bands who keep this thing rolling. This week's picks:

Centaur Midwife
This kind of humanizes the mythical creature (if that's not an insult to centaurs). Like us, they benefit from help delivering their young. And now I've had a thought that never occurred to me before: where do centaur mamas keep their mammary glands? In the horse spot or the human spot?


Dumpster Baby
Homeless Man
These two get in as a bill, a heartbreaking but perfect pairing -- a little street family. In all seriousness, please remember the less fortunate this season as we celebrate the birth in a barn of a homeless peasant.


Fun X Force
Printed, it looks like a physics equation and read aloud, it sounds like a superhero party league.

Roadkill Ghost Choir
Something gross, something spooky, something inspiring. The spirits of flattened raccoons and possums join their voices in song.

UPCOMING: Your Mother Should Know CD release show, with Tom Price Desert Classic, Can You Imagine?, and Dead Bars  Friday, January 23 at the Highline Bar. I'd want to go to this show even if I wasn't playing! https://www.facebook.com/events/374070109426331/

November 29, 2014

One holiday down, we return to our normally scheduled blog plan. Out of an abundance of choices, these five rose to the top:

John Paul and the Apostles
Spreading the rock and roll gospel! This puts a nice Biblical twist on the classic X and the Y structure. It also reminds me that I'm still waiting for Pope George Ringo.

Slums of Utopia
There's a whole dystopian novel contained in these three words. And they're playing their first show tonight!

Urine Idiot
This is so punk. Sometimes low humor is exactly what you need.

Weird-ons
This word collision makes a sexual reference that is more hilarious than sexy. Also very punk.

Wizard Police
I didn't know nerdhop was even a thing, but I love it when I can grab the first band in the first show in the week's listings. What kind of fantasy author would I be if I didn't honor a wizard reference? It makes perfect sense that wizard crime would require a special force.

November 23, 2014

Due to a shortened holiday week, the pickings are a little slim in the club listings, so I'm taking this opportunity to do a Thanksgiving Retrospective of some favorites from the past. I have selected from Square Pig's first year in two categories: Names that are still Hands-Down Brilliant and Bands that have Been on a Bill with Your Mother Should Know. Here's what I had to say way back when:

Hands-Down Brilliant


Eighteen Individual Eyes
(from November 13, 2010) I have delighted in this name for months, so I'm thrilled they came up this week. The inclusion of "individual" makes it for me -- it's not just "eighteen eyes" but "eighteen individual eyes."  Is this an eighteen-eyed creature, each eye functioning independently? Eighteen one-eyed creatures? A nine-piece band? It's also fun to say -- all those vowels just roll off the tongue.

Out Like Pluto
(from November 20, 2010) I like Pluto. I'm sorry it got demoted from the planet club. On the other hand, it's so far out, maybe it doesn't want to be in our lame club.

High Class Wreckage
(from January 8, 2011) Yay! I've been waiting for these guys to show up. This name trips off the tongue, yet feels like an oxymoron. Full disclosure: I've seen High Class Wreckage twice. Their shows are reliably loud, dumb, full-on fun. Expect high-jinks and physical contact. (Technically, HCW was on a bill with YMSK, but before my tenure so I'm not counting it).

Garage a Trois
(from April 16, 2011) The perfect relationship in the garage-band capital. Way to pull off a foreign-language pun! (I'm also amused that the band is a four-piece).

Gazebo of Destruction
(from May 14, 2011) This one belongs to the opposing images school of band names. "Gazebo" is refined, elegant, civilized. "Destruction" is everything but. It doesn't hurt that "gazebo" figures in a couple of running family jokes.



 On a Bill with Your Mother Should Know

Ancient Warlocks
(from February 5, 2011) This appeals to my fantasy-novel side. Music and fiction are the closest to magic we can get: something out of nothing. It also evokes Spinal Tap and their tiny Stonehenge, and that makes me smile.

Black Plastic Clouds
(from November 5, 2011) As if black clouds weren't threatening enough! Any mention of black plastic reminds me of the ultimately ineffective weed barrier the previous owner of our house used in the front yard. We were digging pieces of black plastic out of the ground for years.


Curtains for You
(from December 4, 2010) Full disclosure: I'd heard of this band years before I saw them at the Columbia City Theatre (which has a stage with actual curtains), and the keyboard player has visited my house. But I think I would list them even if that weren't so. I like how the name references another era and aspect of American pop culture. (I tend to pronounce it "coitains" like the gangsters in old Bugs Bunny cartoons.) 


Pouch
(July 2, 2011) I've been hearing about these guys and liked the name from the start. Pouch is one of those words that's fun and funny to say. (I'm planning to go hear them at EMP today, so it seemed like a good time to drop them into the blog.) I hope to see more bands named for hand luggage.

November 15, 2014

I'll skip the small talk about our prematurely wintry weather and get right to the band names:

Choir Vandals
One week ago in a church theatrical, I played a mischievous chorister who opened the show by vandalizing the choir room. And now, this. Merely a coincidence?

Every Time I Die
I like the uncertainty. It's only four words, but the lack of punctuation leaves this phrase open to at least two interpretations. Is it merely an exaggeration of embarrassment, or does this character get multiple endings?

First Aid Kit
Not playing in Seattle this week as far as I know. Joel Adams, a photographer kinsman, posted a photo that he took of this band at Fun Fun Fun Fest. I loved the photo and made careful note of the name, which implies that your life could be literally saved by rock and roll.

John Hamhock and the Rooster Run Band
I love it when someone builds creatively on the classic X and the Y structure. All on his own, the frontman evokes a country-fried founding father, while the band evokes strutting, crowing confidence. Put them together and I think you can count on an enthusiastic and noisy good time.
  
Lavacado
A word mash-up that produces profoundly spicy guacamole.

UPCOMING: Your Mother Should Know CD release show, with Dead Bars and headliner Tom Price Desert Classic, Friday, January 23 at the Highline Bar. I'd want to go to this show even if I wasn't playing! https://www.facebook.com/events/374070109426331/